White People Say Cinco De Mayo Wasn’t The Same Without Wearing A Sombrero In Public

By Gabby Gutierrez-Reed It’s May 6th and we have another Colorado Cinco De Mayo in the books. It was a day that left the already struggling grocery stores stripped of avocados and corn chips. Many people (white people) were disappointed that they didn’t get to experience their $5 Hornitos Margaritas on the balcony of the Viewhouse for some “piñata swinging fun.” Cinco De Mayo represents an unlikely Mexican victory during the French-Mexican War on May 5, 1862; however, yesterday’s battle was whether to wear a sombrero, a pancho, or both! Kelly Wright stated, “It means so much to me to be able to wear sombreros at the local barrio with my compadres. Yesterday was so different without that. Instead, I just stayed home with Corona. Oh no, not the virus, the beer. Ugh, I didn’t want to be THAT person during this interview.” She began tearing up after this, white privilege streaming down her face. Many members of the Latinx community are offended by this type of cultural appropriation. “It’s blatantly disrespectful.” says Emily Torres, a local activist. We caught up with Cameron Bradstifer, a resident of LoDo. This is what he had to say, “Cultural appropriation, smultural shmupropriation. Wow that really doesn’t work does it? Um well, I took a Spanish class in college so it’s okay if I wear this.” Culturally insensitive? Absolutely. Either way, this shit happened, again.

Gabby Gutierrez-Reed is a Denver based comedian. She’s been in the High Plains Comedy Festival and Beast Village Comedy Festival. Now that live performance has been put on hold, she has a lot of time to explore her “creative options.”