• Westish Contributor

Report Finds Denver Art Museum Would Be Sick Tony Hawk Level

By Zeke Herrera

Research conducted by DU students getting high at a rally last week proved that with minor adjustments, (such as a pile of flaming cop cars or a Shotgun Willie Skateboarder) the Denver Art Museum would be a “hella tight” addition to the Tony Hawk Pro Skater franchise. With some researchers speculating that it could possibly be “sick af” with the right conditions. It’s avant garde angles, obscurely shaped statues and bountiful handrails would make for some gnarly shuvits, kiwi flips and halfcabs in a videogame medium or as one researcher put it:

“Just like all the different ways you could grind and stuff. It seems like it would be dope. It just wouldn’t be very practical for a real skateboard probably.”

Another brought up that it would do exceptionally well for catching big air. Tony Hawk couldn’t be reached for comment and neither could Bam Margera but Ryan Sheckler had this to say:

“Uh. Yeah, I guess that would be pretty cool.”

A rerelease of THPS 1&2 is scheduled for September of this year. No word yet on if there will be a DAM level but my guess is no.

Zeke’s a guy, he’s got a bunch of stuff but he does not want you touching it. As a matter o’fact don’t even look at it.

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